To be completely honest my lack of posting has been largely due to the overwhelming jumble of thoughts and emotions that would make the airy and light posts seem unauthentic.  I have been very very open about ALL of the steps of our adoption journeys until what seemed like the end of Sifan's adoption.  So much has gone on behind the scenes that I cannot share on this blog, things that involve other families, our daughters' backgrounds, agencies' behaviors past and present, and ethics in Ethiopian adoption.  I am very conflicted as I am a wear your emotions on your sleeve type of girl who will talk about anything. However, the circumstances that have arisen in the last year have brought up a lot of issues and thoughts that could only be written as a rough draft....things that I am constantly researching and revising and may never be ready to put out for a final print.  Adoption doesn't seem to lend it self to a period...end of story as I first thought it would.  Child home, child adjusted is not the end of the story.  Adoption is so complex. Children grow up into teenagers who question and adults who contemplate.  I can only imagine that the questions and concerns I have now will only be the tip of the iceberg of the issues my daughters will bring up when they are old enough to think about and understand the complexities of adoption and their background. I will try to keep this blog as "real" as I can but I am sure that I will likely be erring on the side of superficial at least in cyberspace ;)